Have you come across this phrase and wondered how it applies in a non biblical sense? I have questioned that, whenever I have been blamed or accused by someone especially my close ones. We often have expectation(s) from someone close to you to understand you the way you understand yourself or even beyond. When we are faced with accusations and confrontations for the things you haven’t done and meant to do then our world is completely shaken. It feels like its crumbling and according to your instincts you either fight or flee from the scene. The after effects is very bitter, like a heavy cloud over you.

Few of us spend days remunerating the situation, some of us spend our energy with anger, irritation and sense of hopelessness, in any case it results in energy being drained out of you. I first came across this phrase in the series Mentalist, where Patrick Jane who is the mentalist uses it as a humorous statement to a criminal, when he called him names. This year I was reminded by my therapist, when I was talking about a upsetting situation for me, someone said something to me they should not have said. For that my therapist asked me a simple question, Yes that is expected from that person given the history with him and the known issues from him, but what is it in you that is getting disturbed even though you know it is untrue accusations? Wow, I was speechless, because I had a moment of clarity there, like someone was cleaning my foggy glasses for me and putting it on me to see clearly.

From then on till today I am able to pause before reacting to someone so that I can respond from clarity. They can think A-Z about me which may be true or untrue, they may provoke for reactions, I pause to look within and instead of the typical flight or fight reaction , I respond from the sense of clarity. It took me time, but with practise thanks to plenty of opportunities, I can proudly say Sticks and stones break one’s bones, but names will never hurt me!.